Sunday, September 1, 2019

Being a Teachable Dad: Bearing Burdens. Your Own, or Others?

Hello and Welcome Home!

One of the biggest things that have surfaced in this last year of being a dad has been, well, actually something more to do with my marriage.  My wife and I will have been married for 9 years next month, and while I accidentally told everyone it was the big two-digit anniversary; I have come to understand that our 9 year anniversary is its own special milestone. Its been a very eventful year. 


Anyone who knows us will know that we picked up the family and moved halfway across the country just over a year ago. We also went for quite some time without a primary source of income. We had to adjust to an entirely new climate and culture while leaving my wife's parents behind. We struggled with a lot of other things that tested our strength in Christ as a couple and learned some very valuable life lessons. Hince, today's post. We are learning the value of standing, watching and waiting for things in our faith, but also in life. 

I felt for a long time that I needed to carry the burden of taking care of my family on my own. I struggled with trying to take care of everything on my own; If I'm being truthful, I still do. The reality has been though that as I have stood back, watched and waited, things were happening that I didn't really realize were happening until after they happened. I was behind the times, lost in translation, cut off from reality, surrounded by Chaos.  In the midst of it all, I forgot there was someone else walking this path with me. In fact, there were actually four other people walking this path beside me. 

My Wife, and Yes, my kids, were right there with me.

The simple truth is that I thought I had to take care of everything and everyone, myself. That is a huge burden to carry. It is a burden that I would not wish on anyone. My family and I could take on this new life together. While many of the choices had to be made between my wife and I; The kids were there too. Every choice made affected them as much, and even more than it affected us.  I had to take a step back and evaluate the reality of the choices we were going to make. My wife and I had to rely on each other more than ever before. The other truth that I realized was that we didn't have to do it on our own either. 

There were those who had been placed in our path that could help us along the way and even those that would be with us through the more eventful parts of our journey down the road. Being a teachable dad is not something I can do on my own.  The lessons I learn can come in all different shapes and sizes. I can't teach my kids without the help of others and I really shouldn't try too, LOL. There are things I simply cannot teach my children and there are lessons I simply cannot learn in my own strength. A different, fresh perspective can be... illuminating.

Don't try to do it on your own.

Know when you need to let go of the reins and accept help from others

Understand that life is filled with teachable lessons

Accept there will be those that can help you along the way.

Listen to the advice of others, while learning what to use and even what not to use.

Being a teachable dad embraces all of those things and more. When you feel burdened, remember you do not have to face the world alone. Living life can be hard, learning that your burdens don't have to be your own is what will keep you afloat, even though the worst of storms.  

It's somewhat hard to believe I'm just now really seeing this lesson evolve more so after 9 years of marriage, but this is the last year of the single-digits and there is no telling what life will bring through the double-digit years. Being a dad and a husband come hand in hand but more on that next time.  

Living by Faith, with our Family; 


M.E.

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