Being a Dad that Embrace's Chaos

Hello and Welcome Home!

Have you ever thought about what being a dad in the midst of the Chaotic storms our children put us through in life means? I've been spending a great deal of time with everything going on right now trying to figure this one out. Most of what is going on in the world around us just doesn't really make a lot of sense.

I'm not one to get into politics or current events but I do feel sometimes that they collide and cause issues in the lives of those around us. I'm also not someone that intentionally blasts their viewpoint out there in aggressive manners, except when it comes to my kids and the chaotic moments they, let's say 'bless us with'. Dealing with it is always one of the hard parts of my day.

However, I have been learning ways to work through it though. Most of the time it comes back to my wife telling be "Love, it's time to step back for a moment. Think about what your about to do and then ask yourself is it the best course for you to take right now?" Okay, so most of the time she's telling me that in her 'you'd better chill' voice, but still, you get what I'm saying. In her own special way, my wife reminds me that I have to work through the chaos instead of adding to it. 

What are some ways that I work through that with my kids, you ask? Well..... If I'm honest I'm not always the best at it but one of the things I do is I make sure that every day sure my kids know I'm a playful dad, who loves them regardless of the chaos they throw at me. So when I get the chance I play around with them and give them a little love. 

In those chaotic moments, I find myself realizing more and more when I'm responding in a way that will add to the chaos. What happens is that those playful moments come back to the forefront of my mind and I remember, "I'm not a mean dad." I also tend to make attempts to put humor into my discipline tactics. Being a dad doesn't mean I have to be firm in how I discipline, it means I need to be confident in myself.

As a person, I'm naturally a goofball, anyone that really knows me knows that about me. However, I do put on this very serious persona which can get me into trouble sometimes, but anyway... 

If being a dad forces me to be serious all the time then I'm not staying true to who I really am and my kids will see that. Honestly, they call me out on it at times too. It's shocking really. The first time my son pointed out that I was being too serious, It really opened up my eyes, he's only 5. I took him to the park and just let him talk. I learned so much, It was really impressive. 

I digress though, well not really, the next point was to listen to your kids. LOL. Our Children are so much smarter than we ALL give them credit for, they see things in us that we really don't see in ourselves. If we are willing to let them speak, those chaotic moments tend to be shorter. Why? because most of the time they just want their voice to be heard. Our Children have voices too and encouraging them to speak gives them a place in the family.

Chaotic moments are always going to be part of our lives and being a dad who works through the chaos means being a dad who listens, who doesn't lose sight of who they are, and being a dad who knows when to step back and evaluate their actions, or at least listens to their wife when they speak up about it. Next time, one of those storms form, lets work to find a way to break through it. 

"A man without self-control is like a city broken into and left without walls." Proverbs 25:28 ESV

Living by Faith, with our Family, 

M.E.