Being a Dad: Embracing Failure (in more ways than one)

Hello and Welcome Home!

I have a confession to make and I'm not really happy about it. I failed to keep this updated as much as I should.  So many times an idea has struck and something has prevented me from sharing about it.  So many times I have learned something about being a dad and not had the energy to write something about it.

Well, today, I'm making the time, I'm forcing myself to get something out and I am so happy I've done just that.  Here is a simple truth, I am not the best dad in the world nor am I the worst and neither are you. Being a dad comes with so much pressure and it is easy to lose sight of the fact that every one of us learns something about fatherhood every day.

During this whole ordeal with the Covid Pandemic, I have been doing a lot, I mean a lot, of soul searching. While I don't contribute that to my lack of posts, I do feel like this whole thing has had an impact on my inspiration. Each day is a little harder than the last and while I'm very much an introverted person, I need social interaction to keep my sanity. I'm sure there are a few of you that can relate, LOL. I have struggled to keep moving forward with several things and its been a hard thing to accept.

I realized at some point that I wanted so much to post more often during this time of struggle to post more encouraging messages, but have failed to do so. As I thought about doing this, I was reminded of certain moments over the last few months where I have failed to react to a situation with my kids the way I should have as well. I imagine many that read this will feel the same way. Being a dad isn't an easy thing, is it?

Here is the lesson I've learned, there are going to be moments where we dads screw up. There are going to be moments where we dads respond differently than we really should have. I know the other day, I got pretty upset about something and reacted one way and my 5 year old actually called me out on it. I was shocked. I had not realized what I was doing at that moment. My son was right, and it was my responsibility to take action and admit I had failed.

It was one of the hardest things I've ever done, and I imagine I will have to do it again in the years to come. The reality is though, that I won't always have my son to tell me I've failed. So the question came to mind, what can I do to help me recognize when I react the wrong way in moments like this.

Honestly, there is no right answer. My answer is to step back and evaluate the situation even if I only have seconds to do so. Someone else's answer may be to take a moment and take a deep breath. Another father may say, I just won't do anything and let my better half take care of it. The motivation is not to focus on any one answer, but to find multiple ways to work through these moments.

There are going to be times when we fail, we are human after all right? The way we overcome the idea of failure is not to think of it as a failure. The way to overcome failure is to realize, we are learning every day. The Answers, no matter how much we desire to be the best, are never the same. We all handle Being a Dad our own way and while there are always recommendations, the root of each of those recommendations is to learn from our mistakes and move on.

So, next time I get to a point of realization and can admit, I'm not the best or the worst at being a dad is the moment I will discover even more about the beauty of learning to be the best dad I can be. Embrace your moments of failure and find ways to learn from them without dwelling too much on the struggle. I know its real, but don't let it get to you.

Living by Faith, with our Family,

M.E. "Be strong and bold; have no fear or dread of them, because it is the Lord your God who goes before you. He will be with you; he will not fail you or forsake you. Do not fear or be dismayed." - Deut. 31:6,8